When You Finally Know

Suddenly you awake, and the
three-year-old who wondered what
it would be like to wake up old has
been answered.

Your first love no longer holds a place
in the heart you swore would never heal
from the breaking,
and the monsters in the closet,
the alligators under the bed,
have revealed their presence,
and have been shamed into hiding
under some other anxious child’s bed,
although you didn’t mean to send them.

Those who would disappoint you,
have done so,
the husbands and mothers
who would drive you to suicide
are dead, or are at last dead to you.

It’s funny.
The day you feared the most,
the day you realized you were not
going to climb Mount Everest
has come and gone,
and you did not collapse
in a small plume of smoke
of the nothingness
you perceived your life to be,
but rather you got up,
went to work,
came home,
played with your dog,
and made supper.

Lately,
you seek the cloak of sleep –
your dreams are movies
of people you knew
but did not know, and
houses where you lived and
left roll by in slow motion,
the unfamiliar curtains billowing
in the still wind, and you see
but just for a moment,
a small face in the window
lit with the pale yellow
of late afternoon sun.

The Blue Bud Vase

The Blue Bud Vase

I was working last night and all of a sudden I looked up from my writing and there was a pink carnation in a blue bud vase sitting there, waiting for me to notice. I’d like to say it was the work of fairies, or an event worthy of time warp proportions, but I know it was my husband who quietly added this bit of serenity to the night. Thanks, Greg!

The Library

The Library

As a teenager, I loved wandering through the booksellers in NYC, and through one shop in particular, called Dauber and Pine on 5th Avenue. I loved the sometimes choking smell of the books and the explosive sneezes from nearly every patron, including myself, ignited by the dust that was everywhere. Please cover your nose when you view my photo/illustration.

The Kitchen Chair

The Kitchen Chair

I took this photo with my Samsung Galaxy 3 and applied an photo app to it to make it into a painting. I think I might have this photo printed on canvas and then paint over it with acrylics.

The Smoke House

The Smoke House

Another photo taken with my phone and dizzied up with the picture app I’ve discovered. It almost looks like something from Pooh’s Sketchbook–although it was taken outside my back door in Williamsburg, VA, this morning.

Roses

Roses

I have an app on my phone that lets me manipulate the photos I take. I’m having such fun with it because I could never draw, and I’ve always wished I could; but it seems that my perspective is two dimensional, like Grandma Moses – flat. If I copied something, I could add the depth, but never easily. Technology is a wonderful and amazing tool. PS: the roses were from my friend, Janet, who knew they were badly needed.